What was on my phone?!?!

I'm so frustrated because yesterday one of my apps disappeared from my phone and now there's this gap where SOMETHING used to be.

The thing is I cannot remember WHAT THE HELL WAS THERE!. I've gone through all my apps and I can't figure out what it was! It's missing, and it's driving me crazy because I can't replace it because IDK What it is!

PS: My app says it's 71 and cloudy but when I took this screenshot there's not a damn cloud in the sky and it's gotta be in the 80's at least right now. Screw you, crappy weather app!

Why did I move to where everything was on fire?

I got to Central Washington at the end of summer last year. There were a couple wildfires, but none nearby.

Now we're at the start of summer here. This is a photo I took in front of my house last night.

That's a wildfire a few miles away. It was at 500 acres then. It was at 1000 acres this morning. It's not in danger of spreading to where I'm at, but it's too close for me. What's interesting is a lot of locals are just "meh" because it's so common here.

Why did I move here, again?

Can't we just let people enjoy the holiday?

So we recently had Father's Day, which is a day to celebrate all the dads out there. Of course, social media was flooded with people with pics of them and their fathers with sweet heartwarming messages. That's what the holiday is all about, right? Post happy messages on Facebook and get your dad a tie.

Of course, not everyone has a father. Some of my friends posted photos of their "alternative" fathers, which I think is perfectly acceptable. But apparently I have a lot of really bitter friends, because there were a lot of mopey people who seemed to be trying to turn the holiday into a poor-them pity-fest. Some of the posts were along the lines of "Enjoy your holiday, I'll be bitterly weeping in the corner" or some such.

Just, can we not? If you're that bitter, maybe take a hiatus from social media for a day. Find a friend to vent to, or a counselor if you're in a real pit. But to broadcast oh woe is me to your entire friends list and trying to pull their focus on you instead of their dads is a bit selfish and probably not a healthy way to cope with your issues. You're basically saying I see you're happy with your dad but pay attention to MEEE instead. That's what it comes across as to me.

Maybe I'm being a bit harsh. I can't exactly understand where they're coming from. But it just doesn't sit right with me. The closest I can have as an equivalent was the first Valentine's Day after my divorce. Lots of singles post similarly mopey posts around that day. I chose instead to leave the keyboard alone and just flip off the monitor while drinking lots and lots and lots of wine. Because as much pain as I was in, I didn't want to rain on anyone else's parade. Because the holiday wasn't about me.

(As an aside, I had a math teacher whose birthday was Valentine's Day, and he said for years as a kid growing up, he thought everyone was just celebrating his birthday every year. It wasn't until he was like 10 or something that he figured it out.)

So, let's check ourselves before we post, right?

In summary:

Appropriate Father's Day posts: celebrating your dad, memorializing your late dad, celebrating adopted dad figures, etc

Not appropriate Father's Day posts: mopey shit that makes it all about you and brings everyone down.

PSA: Honking your horn doesn't fix cars

I feel I need to explain this, because I saw this happen recently, and it's happened to me in the past, and people just don't get it: if a car is broken, honking another car horn at it won't magically fix it.

Cars break down. Sometimes it's because car maintenance is expensive and time consuming and you're busy and broke as hell, and you've just been praying to the car gods that your car will start and get you to work, but car gods are fickle douchebags. Even when you do make the appropriate virgin sacrifices and follow your car manufacturer's recommended maintenance schedule, cars can still break down, because again, car gods are douchebags. That's the best explanation I have.

If you're lucky, your car will break down in a parking lot, somewhere out of the way. If you're unlucky, you'll come to a stop at a red light, and when the light goes green, your car won't go, leaving you stranded in the intersection.

This happened to my ex and I on a busy highway. It was an old Buick, one of the boxy 80's models that was more land-boat than car. One of the electrical components apparently had a hot short, and all the electronics died, so there was no way to start the car until it cooled. So I got out to try and start pushing the land-boat into the nearest parking lot to get it out of the way. (Yes, of course I got out and pushed. My ex was a useless turd, plus he had the stature of a hobbit, and he didn't even lift, bro.)

What was interesting was that everyone's immediate reaction around us was to honk at us. While I was actively trying to push a land-boat uphill all by myself. Yes, I'm aware it's blocking traffic, that's why I'm pushing it. No, it won't start, that's why I'm pushing it! It would be far more helpful if someone would have gotten out and, you know, helped, but all I got were people honking.

Honking doesn't help. Getting out and pushing does. I got the land-boat pushed off the road, but the driveway was too steep for me to finish pushing it up. I stood there bracing it and futilely attempting to push it further for probably almost five minutes before someone was kind enough to come over and help.

So if someone is stranded, if you can, stop and help them move out of the way. Don't honk. It's not going to magically fix their car.

Also as an aside, I keep seeing commercials for roadside assistance where people seem to need help changing a tire. People, learn how to change your own tires. I had to do it once in dress shoes and a suit and I managed to do it without even getting dirty, and I'm really not a mechanically inclined person so if I can pull that off, people can learn to change their own tires. Unless you got some crazy lifted truck or something it's not that hard.

How adult am I? Also the dog is doing good

On some days, I'm like...

I got my bills paid and house clean and lawn mowed and I can be a fully functioning, responsible, mature adult!

And on some days, I'm like...

I don't know how adult I really am some days.

I'm still technically in my 20's for, like, a few more weeks, so is that excuse enough?

Also, the dog seems to be doing well. We went on a 4 mile hike up Rattlesnake Ledge yesterday. He jumped over a crevasse near the top whilst chasing chipmunks without any untoward signs (he did get pain meds before and after the hike just in case). So I think he's on the mend.

My dog is an expensive little penis licker

I can't call him a ball licker because he has no balls.

Pups went to the vet. He loves the vet, because he is weird. The vet send him home with lots of drugs to dope him out and orders for rest. He wasn't convinced it was spinal yet. He thinks it's a pulled muscle. We'll see. The total vet was around $100.

Today I went to Petco to get some pet stairs (so he doesn't have to jump up on the bed) and some cushions (my dog likes to lay on the porch on one side and sun himself, and the vet thinks that's a contributing factor), and it cost me like almost $200. Pet stairs are expensive! Pet cushions are expensive! I also bought a bunch of stuff for the guinea pig but most of the cost was dog stuff. Then I went home and looked up some more back-friendly harnesses than what I currently have. The back brace my vet suggested is $100-140! I ended up spending another $50 for some new harnesses and leads; I'm gonna hold off on that back brace to see if I really need it or if the dog's issue resolves with meds and rest.

At least the dog figured out the stairs pretty quickly. He's already using them without prompting from me, and I've only had them for a couple hours. He's half Jack Russell, so he's smart, though he often does stupid shit that makes you forget he's smart, like when he climbs up a large rock and gets himself stuck so I have to climb after him and rescue him.

He's lucky he's adorable.

My dog is sick, but maybe it's a conspiracy

I came home from work two days ago to find my dog stiff and sore. I don't know what he did while I was away, but he must have partied too hard, so today I have to try and get him into the vet.

He had a slipped disc about three years ago, and I'm afraid this might be the same issue cropping up.

Dogs are expensive.

This morning around 4:30 my smoke detector started to die. Normally that's not a sound that bothers him but with him in pain, it ramped his anxiety up to 11. So I had to get up and take down the smoke detector, rip out the batteries, and bury it under a pile of coats (because I don't have fresh batteries for it at the moment), and then give him some baby aspirin because that's all I have until I get to the vet. He finally calmed down about an hour later, whereupon he got comfortable, spread out, and pushed my boyfriend off the bed.

The last time he got a slipped disc (I'm assuming this time it's a slipped disc at least), it was right after I registered him for WTA's Hike-a-Thon. I didn't want to register myself because I knew I didn't stand a chance at placing, but I figured if I registered Ozzy in the four-legged class, he might have a chance. A few days after I registered him, he was sore.

I didn't participate in subsequent years due to being busy dealing with school and/or divorce stuffs.

I was planning on doing it this year though. This time he's been kind enough to wait until before registration opens to get sore. I think he knows and just doesn't want to do it. It's a conspiracy to get out of Hike-a-Thon.

Oh, Doggy. Why do you have to get yourself hurt so?

When time slows down

Ever been in an accident where you can't stop what's happening, but you have enough time to come to terms with it and prepare for it? A few years go, I was just finishing up one of my paper routes when I got hit by a drunk driver. It totaled my car, my first car. That car, a '97 Mitusbishi Mirage, was on its last legs and burned oil like no one's business, but I still had hoped to retire it on my terms. It had a whopping 1.4L engine, the smallest gas four-cylinder ever put in a vehicle as far as I know. When I got wires for it the guys at the parts store laughed at how small they were. But it was my first car, and I loved it, and it got wrecked by a drunk driver.

I saw the wreck coming. The guy was speeding around a corner, lost control, and was careening sideways when he plowed into the front of my car. There was no where for me to go. I just had to brace for it and take it. I came out okay except for my right foot and knee, which were on the brake pedal and took the force when he hit me. I spent the subsequent summer in physical therapy to recover from that, since it caused a lot of deep tissue scarring.

Even though it was probably only five or ten seconds from when I saw him lose control to when he hit me, I had time for all of the following thoughts to go through my head.

That guy's moving a bit fast.

That's some Tokyo Drift shit going on there.

Shit, he's going to hit me.

Shit, HE'S GOING TO HIT ME!

Dammit, got nowhere to go to.

It's okay. You're gonna survive this. It's gonna hurt, but you can survive this.

It's gonna fuck up your car, though.

You're not gonna finish your deliveries.

Call 911 first, then call your boss. Then the insurance company.

You're gonna need a new car after this.

Aw man, he's gonna fuck up my car.

I really like this car. 

Yeah, I mean, this car's already pretty fucked. But really? Why you gotta do this to me?

I'm gonna be fucked for days on my paper route now. Probably will take at least a few days to get a new car. How long does insurance reimbursement take? Forever I'm sure. Shit.

I'm gonna miss you car. You were a damn good car.

Fuck this jerk. This guy's an asshole. He's ruining my car.

Okay you can scream now.

CRASH

Yeah, I was more concerned about my car than my own safety. Priorities, man.